Lost

Here it comes once again,
Coming to overwhelm my heart,
My mind, my soul, my entire being,
I don't know what to do,
No, I don't know what to do.

I need support, I need help,
Yet I don't want to trouble them with these problems of mine,
One would wonder why, even though I'm lost, almost helpless,
It's simple, for as I don't want them to worry nor fear for me,
This is my battle, and not theirs...

Yet a part of me hopes that they will come and help,
But my rational and too-good side refuses to do so,
So here I am now, wandering in this world,
Alone, desolate, and lost,
As my mind is cast into the abyss of confusion and fear.

On the side note, I have good things as well,
Won a trophy today, for a spelling competition,
All the while I acted surprised cause I honestly had forgotten,
Yes, my mind is and was that tormented with that much thoughts.

One after another, thoughts come and flee,
And so does emotions ranging from frustration to happiness,
After all this I'm still not free,
Leaving myself frustrated and almost helpless,
Eventhough I know I wasn't.

I have a perfectly good life,
This seems excellent on the surface,
But deep down, is the REAL me, partly hiding,
And also partly shown,
I wonder, as always, when would I be able to show them all
the whole of me,
The person I am and always will be,
although there might be changes in the times ahead,
Again, as I said, I hope that one day, I will be able to show them,
Show them all, the true, real and genuine ME.